Bicycles, a short introduction

"Bluecold" (Bluecold) 09/05/2013 at 10:54 • Filed to: cyclelopnik banter

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Boom, bicycles. Bicycles are a perfectly valid form of transport and since I feel there is a bit of animosity between cyclists and motorists in the US of A, I, as a Dutchman, feel obliged to do my best to spread the relative peace and harmony between motorists and cyclists here to the rest of the world.

The only way I know how is to talk about bicycles, which would in turn have people thinking about bicycles and the rest solves itself. My only foreign language is English, England is arrogant enough to state that they don't need to learn anything ( !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! utter cunt), so that leaves only the USA to ramble to.

Attached to this post is a picture of the evolution of bicycles. It's not quite complete, but the point is that there are many many bicycle designs. And many of those are rubbish and have no use on the street. The important thing in assessing if the owner of a bike knows what he's doing instead of just cocking about is to keep in mind that most bicycles are only acceptable if they're used in a manner they're designed to be used.

Piloting a track cycle on the street is similar to driving a rally car on the street. Legal, fun to some, but really not something you actually want to do and people will rightfully think you're a cunt. Same goes for mountainbiking on a cycling path. A mountainbike is slow and flings whatever is lying on the road everywhere due to those knobby tires. However, people will also think you're an idiot if you drive your opafiets on a trail path.

So, if you want to ride a bike somewhere, get a bike that fits the environment. And remember, no bike can do multiple tasks. Also, vitally important is to realise that there are a few bikes that are uncool under any circumstances

-electrically assisted bikes
-recumbents
-folding bicycles while commuting (while practical, too clever for their own good)

large chart

HammerheadFistpunch > Bluecold 09/05/2013 at 11:13

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The mountain bike section is severely underrepresented. Trekking bikes =/= evolve into freeride...not in any sense or form. The mountain bike evolved from the balloon tire beach cruiser, the mountain bike evolved into the XC bike, the XC evolved into full suspension which fragmented into DH, Freeride, trail and all mountain XC. This chart would have you believe that the trekking bike was the birth, untrue.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Bluecold 09/05/2013 at 11:19

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In my experience, bike culture in the US tends to be fundamentally warped - often composed of people unwilling to accept that their choice of transport has disadvantages on a street. So, a certain subgroup insists on riding in the middle of their lane making no room for cars to pass, lobbying for the installation of bike lanes, obsessing over "correct bike gear" and otherwise being tits where advocacy is concerned.

At the same time, they're running red lights, cutting off drivers, and otherwise acting hostile toward cars in a bizarre frame of mind of "you don't understand my challenges, and they give me a right to do what I must - you remain morally inferior because you don't ride a bicycle! Earth hater!".

This, in turn, takes the pre-existing impatience of drivers held up behind bikes in areas with no shoulder lanes and bicycles banned from sidewalks, and turns it to eleven. Anyone who is not only holding one up, but being a dick about it tends to make drivers snap. Sometimes drivers snap at completely innocent cyclists as a result of the poisonous interface.

Is the correct process to put bike lanes absolutely everywhere? Well, probably not, as it's expensive (worse in rural areas), and contributes to some issues of car congestion. Bikes are often banned from sidewalks in an effort to protect pedestrians, but serious injury between a bike and a pedestrian pales in comparison to bike/car incidents. Thus, any area with high road speeds or in hilly country should permit bicycles use of the sidewalk within reason. Let's face it, not everybody cycling has the physique to maintain >45mph, and many would struggle to maintain 20 uphill. On a road with a 35 mph limit and cars traveling 40, the cyclist traveling 20 is at a lower speed difference with pedestrians than vehicles, and astronomically less risk.

Outside of that as something communities can do, drivers need to reserve more caution and patience, and cyclists need to concede that no, they do not have the full force of authority of a motor vehicle and act accordingly. The snob culture needs to fade away.

Bluecold > HammerheadFistpunch 09/05/2013 at 11:38

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Well, the evolution of the opafiets (pictured is an omafiets, with a physically impossible driveline) is also completely warped. They came to be in the 1910's as copies of british roadsters. The pictured 'roadster' is not a roadster, it's a sporty bike.

Frank Grimes > Bluecold 09/05/2013 at 13:55

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You are incorrect.

Mister_Moon > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 09/05/2013 at 21:14

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Riding on sidewalks not only sucks but is also dangerous. They are frequently narrow, not very smooth and around here at least, there are many metal road signs impinging on the lane threatening to slice a cyclist to the bone should you make a miscalculation. Then there's all the briars and juvenile tree limbs crowding you on on unmaintained right of way.

What a lot of drivers don't realize is we don't need the whole lane when you pass, 3 feet is plenty of space. Just hold your speed, edge over a little bit toward the center line and pass.

As for riders in the middle of a lane, I have no words. But to be honest, that's something I've very rarely seen in my 35 years of driving and riding. The only time you'll find me in the middle of a lane is when waiting to make a left turn at a traffic signal.

Brian, The Life of > Bluecold 09/05/2013 at 22:25

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If it is your position that bikes with motors are uncool, you've lost credibility with me.

Bluecold > Brian, The Life of 09/06/2013 at 06:15

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electrically assisted bikes. The bike pictured is cool. Electrically assisted bikes are for old people and lazy people.

Brian, The Life of > Bluecold 09/06/2013 at 09:29

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whew

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Mister_Moon 09/06/2013 at 10:39

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As someone who was a biker but not an avid biker in college, I take all your points. However, I'd contend that for someone who isn't pushing their bike at full road speeds but merely trying to get somewhere 80% faster than walking, the narrowness and roughness are a better alternative than the goon squad in the road. I tried often enough to use roads over sidewalks, but some roads are just not meant for any but the fastest rider, and I'd rather travel slowly on the side than push hard and remain at high risk.

Briars, limbs, and road signs are inexcusable to have in the path of travel, pedestrian or cyclist. I speak as someone who's been forced as a pedestrian all the way into the road by limbs and has walked into signs inattentively. Fortunately, US highways and rural areas that most need a biking alternative are most often those that have the sidewalk area trimmed along with the road verge, and thus can be clear enough. Cities, well, that can be troubled all around.